WOW Moment!

Your attention please! I have just completed a new WOW moment! I mowed my own lawn. Yeah, I know it's just a lawn, but it's my lawn and I just finished it. YIPEE! I will admit, it was a bit of a struggle. My lawn is so ruddy that it is not even funny. At one point, I was screaming to get enough momentum going to get up the little upgrade that there is. I was sweating and huffing and puffing and I am sure that I am pretty smelly too. I wish I had a picture. You would probably laugh. I am a complete mess, but I am so proud of myself for being able to accomplish this. For most, this is not a big thing, but to me it is. Now I can mark another thing off of my list of things to be able to do.

What are your WOW moments? Having a WOW moment can be anything from deciding to have baratric surgery to a little thing that most people take for granted like tying your shoes. My hope is that you will begin to have WOW moments and that you will enjoy everyone of them. Life really is for living and having WOW moments is a great part of that.

Today, has been a hard day. So emotional. All I want to do is cry. Ever have to say good-bye to someone and you don't want to? That is where I am today. I need to say good-bye to someone before I can continue on my journey. It's hard, even though I know I will be a stronger person for it. It has always been so hard for me to say good-bye.

I'm sure you have heard the saying that people come into your life for a reason or a season... My problem is, is that I want them in my life for the rest of my life no matter what. I don't want to give them up. Having to give someone up is hard. I don't like it. It makes you have to change and I have gone through so many changes in the past 2 years. Now I am finding that I have to do it again. This time though, the someone that I have to say good-bye to is the old me.

It's the part of me that has been holding on for dear life because it would mean I was moving on and that I don't need that part of me anymore. The part of me that I have always identified myself with. It's not that I don't like the new me, beacuse I do. I really do. It's that with the old me there was a kind of safety and security.

When you have been obese for as long as I have, it is hard to give up the old ways. During the first year after surgery all I did was concentrate on losing the weight. I was focused and I didn't let anything else in. Then comes the second year. Real life started to come back in and I found that I was having to deal with some issues that I thought I had already dealt with. I found that some of my old ways were easier than working on the new ways.

Now though, I know that the old ways are not where I want to be. I want the new ways and I want to embrace them again. Life really is so much better than it was. The surgery was so worth having so that I can have this new life. God has blessed me beyond my wildest dreams. I know He has because God can do anythng you know. He is showing me that the new me really is the "REAL" me.

I am kind of liking the "God wants you to know..."from FB. Today, it read something to the affect that if you need a helping hand you can find one at the end of your arm. Sometimes you will discover that you have 2 hands. One to help yourself and one to help another.

I love helping people whenever I can. I especially have enjoyed mission work. I have participted in a ministry here in Columbus for several years now and feel that I get more out of it than they do.

Today, I met a new friend via FB. She was writing about the fact that she was stalled at losing weight and was looking for some answers or some help. She had already lost a substantial amout of weight, but needed some reassurance. I really felt that God had me read her post at the right time so that He could use me to help her. Give her some answers to what she might want to try to get the scale moving down again, but what I didn't expect was that He used her to help me also.

Having bariatric surgery is such a major event. It takes such courage to admit that you have a problem and need help. Not to mention the courage it takes to put yourself on the operating table and let someone take most of our stomach away. Unless you have been through it, you probably won't understand it.

You go through so many changes. I can't even describe all the changes that you go through. It's not only physical, but very emotional as well. There have been times when I just could not get to the other side of the wall. I couldn't find the door that I needed to go through. I have been so lonely at times. Having a support group or a friend who has gone through bariatric surgery can be so helpful. It's important to talk to someone who can understand. So, today I not only found a hand to help somebody, but I found a hand from somebody that helped me. Thank you, my new friend!

I have a FaceBook page like many people do. I have reconnected with many people from high school and college. It is fun and interesting to catch up with everybody. One of the things that I have on my page is the application "God wants you to know..." The other day God wanted me to know that I can get back to solving all the wrong things in a moment, but how about taking time to treasure all of the good things that are happening.

So for tonight, instead of going on and on about my journey and how bad I was, I would like to take you to how wonderful life is because I have had bariatric surgery. I really do treasure all of the blessings that I have been given. From being blessed to find a doctor that would take me on and for him to have a wonderful staff that took great care of me.

I have also been blessed with a church family that has completely supported me and has been there for me. One of the biggest blessings of support though has been my family. They have been with me through it all and still love me. I could not have gotten through this without them.

Since the surgery there have been so many little WOW moments. Like being able to fit behind the steering wheel of my car and not be squeezed to death. One of my sister's asked me how far I have moved my seat up. I told her I hadn't moved it at all. I was enjoying the space too much.

Another WOW moment came when I went to lunch with my niece and her family and her youngest daughter said "Aunt Ani, you don't huff and puff anymore. What a great thing that was.

A WOW moment also occurred when shopping with my oldest sister and being able to buy a shirt in a regular store and not a BIG girl store as I call them. Actually, just being able to go shopping has been a treasure to behold. And now that I think of it, how did I ever live without jeans. I love my jeans!

So, tomorrow I can go back to solving all the wrong things in my life, but for right now I am going to treasure all the wonderful things that have come my way because I was blessed to have bariatric surgery and change my life.

The First Appointment

The first time I met Dr. Rodriguez for an appointment, he asked " Why me?" because he was in Cincinnati and I lived in Columbus. I told him that I felt led to be there. We talked a little as he was trying to find my BMI on the little chart he had. My BMI wasn't on the chart. It was no where to be found on the chart. Dr. Rodriguez had to figure it out by hand. My starting BMI was 79.3. WOW! He then told me that I was Super Mega Morbidly Obese. Another WOW. What a way to be described. As the tears started rolling down my cheeks. He came over and sat in front of me and took my hands and said "I know that I can help you. It isn't going to be easy. You are going to have to work hard, but I can help you." That was all I needed to hear. He never put me down because I was so grossly obese. He talked to me like a real person and told me he could help me. I definitley knew I was in the right place.

We talked about the different surgeries and he suggested that I have the Vertical Sleeve Gastectomy. The Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy is when the floppy part of the stomach is removed. Basically about 75-80% of the stomach. There is no replumbing of the intestine. Yet because it removes the stomach it is also consider to be a metabolic change to the system. With the results of changing your hormones. By changing the makeup of the hormones, wonderful things happen in the body. Your hunger pattern goes away along with cravings. Your medical conditions tend to go away as well. For some that are diabetic, it completely goes away. The same is true with high blood pressure. It also helps with high cholesteral and sleep apnea. The benfits are AWESOME. The only thing about the surgery is, is that it is a tool. It is not a miracle cure to lose weight. It is a tool to help you lose weight. As long as you follow the program that goes along with having the surgery, you will lose weight and become healthier. The losing of the weight is great, but the main point of the surgery, is to become healthier.

I was thankful for that he suggested the Sleeve because that was the surgery that I wanted. He suggested that because of my size. not only was my BMI 79.3, but my weight was 462lbs, that we do that first and if that doesn't help with getting all the weight off then we could do the RNY later. As I sat there and listened to him talk I was thinking, "There is no way I am going to have another surgery. I am only doing this once and that is it." I knew that I was going to have to make this surgery work. I was going to be successful no matter what. I was so determined about what I was to do. I knew that I was worth all of the work that it was going to take to get to the place where I needed to be. That was a huge thing for me to realize that I was WORTH all of the work. I wasn't going to do it for anybody else except for me and God.

As I said before, little did I know that I was about to meet the doctor that God had chosen for me. The weird part though, was that he was not the doctor that I expected to meet at the seminar. Instead, of meeting Dr. Trace Curry, in walked Dr. Dirk Rodriguez.

In the seminar, Dr. Rodriguez talked about the different types of surgery that he performs. He was very matter of fact about everything. There was no sugar coating anything. At times, I thought he had crawled in my head when he started talking about the fact that I had no social life. That I was discriminated against and that other doctors treated me badly because of my obesity. All of which were true. He then said, "That all of that would stop here, right now, tonight." He said that he would treat me with dignity. That was something most doctors that I had contact with did not do.

Then he said something that I had never heard before. Obesity is a TRUE MEDICAL CONDITION. A what? Did he just say, "Obesity is a true medical condition."? I swear I had never heard that before. I just thought I had let myself go and didn't care and was just so addicted to food that I couldn't stop eating and knew that I needed help. WOW! What an eye opener, I had a medical condition. Dr. Rodriguez explained more about what happens to the body once it hits a certain weight. That it really is necessary to have surgery to get healthier. By the end of the seminar my friend, Twyla, who was with me, looked at me and we both said "This is the place to be." So began my journey with the BEST doctor that God could find for me. More later...

I have heard of writers block, but I think I have bloggers block. It is so difficult to write about oneself when it means that everybody and their cousin can read it. It is so personal and the emotions are still so close to the surface that it is hard to write and not cry all over the computer at the same time. But I have a story that I feel needs to be told. A story that I am hoping will encourage and maybe even help one person to realize that they are not alone in their world of obesity. That there is help if you want it and I am one who wanted it. I am also one that would like to share my success with others to help them with their own "Rescue from Obesity".

I begin with my life verse Jeremiah 29:11, For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. If you asked what those plans were, I could not tell you. I still am not sure. All I know is that I feel that God wants to use me to help those afflicted with obesity and to give them hope and a future. When I started this journey, I was so scared that I was going to die and I was not ready. There were things that I wanted to do and I knew that I couldn't do them being locked up in this huge body that could only sit. I know that there are others just like me and I would so like to help them.

So, I began to pray and then beg and finally pleaded for God to come to my rescue because where else could I go. There was no other place for me to go. I had been having some female issues and I was facing the possiblity of cancer of the uterus. I had just had my third D&C in less than a year. My doctor talked with me about having bariatric surgery. I let her know that I would love to have it if only I had the funds to do it with. My insurance at the time did not cover any kind of bariatric surgery. She offered to see what she could do to help. One night though, I heard a voice that only I could hear, "If you want the surgery you cannot depend on Kim to do the work, you have to do the researching and looking into it. So it began...

I looked into OSU and Mt Carmel. I knew that I would be self pay and needed a place that would have that kind of program. Both had great programs, but both were just way out of my league. I looked into Riverside and they too, had a good program, but were even farther out of my league. I wasn't sure what I was going to do. Finally, a friend at work gave my information for a doctor in Cincinnati at Deaconess Hospital. So I did some reseach on him. I then made an appoointment to go to an informtion seminar to find out more about the surgery and to see if this doctor could be a good fit. Little did I know that on December 18th, 2007, I was about to meet the doctor that God had chosen for me. To be continued....

It's a new day. I now wake up wondering what new things will come along. Before my baritric surgery 2 years ago, I really didn't look forward to getting up in the morning and going to work or whereever. I had to plot and plan everything I did. I couldn't just get in my car and go. I would sit in the parking lot of the grociery store plotting and planning how to get around the store. I would do this for a good 30 minutes. Then 9 out of 10 times, I would go back home. It was just too overwhelming for me to have to walk the isles to get what I needed. I wasn't sure that I could make it around without falling over from being out of breath. I hated using the scooters that were available. I was embarressed and humiliated using them. I just felt like everybody was staring at me.

Today, my life is so different. It is such a blessing to know I don't have to think about how I am going to get around. Now I just go. I rememeber going to my sister's for Christmas and calling her along the way to see if she needed anything from the store before I got there. I think she just about fell over, because I would have never done that before. I love being able to just go and do things, like go to a park to walk, or go shopping with a friend. My life is mine now and worth living every bit of it.

Be Blessed!

Beginning of a Rescue

Today, I went for a walk. It wasn't just any walk. It was a "Walk from Obesity" One might say "So you went for a walk. Big deal." Two years ago I would not have been able to do this walk. Two years ago I was so overweight that I could barely walk, barely breath, barely do anything. I was desperate. I was facing death and I was not ready to die. I was desperate and I needed to be rescued. I beggged and pleaded with God to rescue me. Little did I know that my prayers would be answered in a "Big" way. A way that one knows only God could have done this. Two years ago this is what I looked like 3 hours before Bariatric Surgery.

Today just before the "Walk from Obesity", this is what I looked like. What a change my life has been since I have been "Rescued from Obesity" In future posts I will tell more about my story and the changes my life has gone through. So, please stay tuned...